It has been five and a half months since I’ve been in England and working for St. Stephens, and I have learnt a lot and seen very different church practice from in my country. What I didn’t know before and I was never taught in my religious studies classes or in my home church is that we as Christians are able to have a relationship with our God. Relationship – we all know what that means. We all have some kind of relationship with our families, friends or boyfriends/girlfriends. So we can agree that it works both ways, you give and receive. It is the same with God! He talks to us, all we need to do is to expect, to listen and to recognize His voice.
I kind of believed this but was still very sceptical and frustrated because I had come to a Church where people had a relationship with God and all this seemed very normal for them. I had the feeling that God didn’t want to speak to me and that I didn’t belong here. Until I recognised His voice! I learnt that He often speaks in a still small voice or through other people. It happened like this for me!
When I was at the TNT weekend away we broke into small groups and than we were supposed to listen to God and pray one for another. I felt uncomfortable because this was very new for me and I didn’t hear anything. But one girl got for me the very well known Psalm of David, Psalm 23:
The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not be in want.
He makes me lie down in green pastures; he leads me beside quiet waters,
He restores my soul. He guides me in paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
Even though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil, for you are with me; your rod and your staff, they comfort me.
You prepare a table before me in the presence of my enemies. You anoint my head with oil; my cup overflows.
Surely goodness and love will follow me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever.
This has always been one of my favourite passages in the Bible. But of course my sceptical and suspicious nature told me that it was just a famous Psalm and that it didn’t speak to me.
Then a couple of months later out of the blue I got a letter from a friend of mine with this drawing.
In case you don’t realise she has written a verse from Ps 23. in Croatian.
Again I thought the same! It was just coincidence! But later on when I was preparing the devotions for my team mates with my mentor she mentioned, guess what? Ps23!?
Even though I am a tough nut I had a chat with her about it and realized that all this time God had been trying to speak to me and I had been refusing to hear. All these people have been Christians for a long time and they know the Bible well and they could have chosen any verse.
It was just what I needed! God’s comfort, words from Him telling me that I am not alone.
Just to clarify for those who don’t know about my life:
From the age of 7 I lived in a Children’s home together with about 60 other kids aged from 3 to 18. Then during the last five years I moved around a lot, but I always felt that I was not alone and I made friends easily and during my life there have been various people looking after me. Practically nobody brought me up but I turned out well. I hope! :) You can call this coincidence but I acknowledge that it was God guarding me. It is generally thought that to build a friendship takes years but my experience tells me that when Jesus is my friend I don’t need to be afraid of loneliness. Things just happen in the best way!
Maybe this is strange for you and I find it hard to speak about because I am afraid that people will think I am mad or fanatical; but as our worship pastor said people thought Jesus was a fanatic. So I think I can cope with it!
I would like introduce you to some of my guardian angels as I like to think of them!
Melanie and Vlado are a lovely couple from Croatia. She is a pastor in my home church in Rijeka and he is a lawyer to be, a technology fanatic and hot Simpson’s fan. Strange combination, I know! He cannot always solve my computer problems and sometimes I need to fill their fridge but they will always give me a warm home and chat with me.
Becca and Rich are another lovely couple but from England. She works in the church office and he is an editor. Becca likes good food and Gordon Ramsay; he likes cycling. Both are very passionate Christians and active in the church. I have known them for 5 and a half months and to be honest I didn’t find it very easy to get on with Becca at first, but now I love them and feel as if I have known them for ever. She can tell by my attitude when I am not ok. Sometimes I pop into their flat but I don’t always get offered chocolate or their full attention, which I would certainly expect from British people but they always listen and give support!
My host family Martin and Annette who I wrote about in my first blog (http://rada-albatros.blogspot.com/2006/10/hello-everybody.html) are like a real family to me: supportive, caring and they often counsel me. I have quite a definite point of view and they help me to see things from a different angle, more objectively.
Pastor Luke is a very unusual pastor who likes jewellery (he has pierced ears), has a huge tattoo, never wears robes, may not be big in height but has a big serving heart. He is always ready to help, sincere but kind. I wish I could have some of his characteristics.
There are many more but those at the moment are the closest and I don’t want to bore you.
